I don't have answers, I have endless questions to seek answers. This is my resolution this year to get some of those questions answered. Its often a wall of fire you come to when you do so, if only real firewalls were as tough. Being unafraid is a lot better place than being afraid. 2012 seemed to be the year of fear. Aside from a rhyme its not a good place to be.
Here are what I think makes one live behind walls. Walls are great to keep things in and out. And that is not always a good thing.
6. Lather Rinse Repeat. Regardless of the political spectrum you sit on you are still sitting in a Laundromat watching the cycle. Be it the left side of the street or the right, you come out with your clothes the same state you came in with them. So what is the point? Why watch something that clearly makes you angry? And that is one thing again regardless of your Laundromat of choice you seem to get angrier after the wash cycle. Maybe you need a dry cleaner.
7. Angry White Men. In my quest to write the book/bestseller "Conversation with Idiots" I want to include this member of the quote/unquote White Establishment. I usually only watch them at the Laundromat but of late I have actually spoken to them. Yep, they are as angry as they are on the box. And yes they are an archetype, stereotype and tragic figures as Opera defines. An injured bear seems to have less pain and rage. Why? Where? How? Who? Well who cares. I did get some insight in my conversation with the AWM on New Years Eve and his penultimate moment in time seemed to be his 8th grade history teacher who was so terrible that even 30 years later she fuels his anger today. Commenting that it was teacher tenure that made this moment in history so distressing he carries that rage today. So yep its those Unions. Damn them!
But he did have a hero - the characters in Ayn Rand's novels. Yes a grown man feels that characters in FICTION are his heroes. Wow, to not have real people and role models in life that stand out to fill in your need to aspire and admire you really are angry and did have a bad education.
8. Fiscal Cliff/Middle Class - those terms and phrases need to be retired or thrown off a cliff. Start talking and doing things about the real problems not the kabuki theatre that is what professes as intelligent discussion. And who are these middle class people? The ones who can still afford tickets to this show? Good well again Opera like Kabuki appeal to those of the 1% while Shakespeare was for the 99%. Sons of Anarchy the FX show is often compared to that and you can't get more 99% than bikers. Try flipping the channel, embrace the Walking Dead, as that is what its like for the poors. Zombies who just want to eat.
9. WE built it. Apparently you mean I. The I/Me/Mine is the real We here. As I said in #7 I found that the AWM is very proud of what HE built. There is no "i" in "me". One of the things he also said was during his recent hunting expedition (yes he continued to just walk into that) he said the town of Othello, WA is now predominately Hispanic. He did not use the term "Mexican or Latin" American as I do (well they are American they are here) and how impressed that these children who were brought here illegally (again maybe they weren't brought but born but hey whatever) were working hard and running businesses and being successful and what could we do to get "white" children to be so hard working.
Well remove the word "white" there first asshole. And when I said Education is a key he launched into his memory of the 8th grade teacher who failed him and the whole tenure, union stuff and my comment was: "sorry you have this much anger about something over 30 years ago but if you are so independent and individualistic and don't need anyone you could have overcome this by informing the Teacher she was failing you, not the other way round. Taken over your history class and taught yourself the material or maybe had your parents do that for you."
So much for up by the bootstraps, independent and individualistic. Instead of being an angry white man he was just still that angry white boy of 12 in a classroom who hated that teacher. There is your real reason behind that movement.
10. Work hard/Entitlements. Who doesn't and isn't. Again back to my AWM conversation I heard both. I am sorry you seem to be the one who thinks that you work hard and that it entitles you to do what? Be an asshole. You clearly are working way too hard. In the course of this exchange he asked me if could "work hard" and he would give me a job. I go "I don't? I get up at 4 a.m. every morning to see if I am working that day. I substitute teach and don't know if and where I am working. I go into different schools, different classrooms, teaching different subjects, to kids of different ages, educational needs and have no idea what I am walking into and that is not hard? I only get paid when I work, I get no benefits, no health care, no pension, have no job security? Is that not hard." He had no response. But what a patronizing a condescending and rude remark to anyone. There are people who don't work hard but I hate to break it to you AWM, its not the people you think.
I think that is where the word Entitlement is misused. They mean I, Me and Mine are Entitled and You can't have it, share in it or deserve it because you are a Poor. Read that Constitution that you love so much. Oh wait that whole "equality" thing has qualifications and limits. WE get it. WE really do.
11. Find Community. Mine is here. A disparate group who really define the term diversity. I am so grateful that in what I hope is the last and only worst time of life, the people who have come to support and more importantly BELIEVE me have been the best thing in this worst thing to happen. They are not "online" friends. They are very real and very relevant. I have found a great joy in the laughter and tears I have shared and I am grateful. I resolve to never forget that. Community is real, its personal and its physical.
12. End this book. Put it on the shelf in the back for a rainy day. Its time and I have been reading it too long. I don't believe in book burning but rules have exceptions and this is one book that as I read it I am also writing it. You can't write when you are doing it. It needs time for perspective and I need that. We all need to look back on the year and see it from a place of distance. And distance is time.
I am adding on to the Top 12 to the the list to reflect the year ahead.
13. Live.
Happy is another word of personal definition and meaning. Find your place of happiness and your resolutions that will accomplish it. 13 is a lucky number.
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